Oh my god, like, opening night to the max!

Welcome to the 1980's.  It's hairspray, it's color in neon, rabbit ears on the televisions.  It's attitude.  Like....totally mega lots of it.  Get your fingers ready to twirl your hair, chew insane amounts of gum and roll your eyes as your primary form of communication*.  No one is politically correct, gender bending is hip, and lawsuits meant something really terrible happened.  Before the eighties bad meant bad, post Michael - bad was good! You could tell an asshole they were, and not wonder if you would die.  Fuzz didn't exist at school.  Worst day - you got beat up, but at most you lost a bit of pride, and at the end of the day..... there was always lipstick.  It was the age of expression.

So, for a girl born in the wrong decade, grab the remote, turn your speakers up loud and let's start your daily tour of the 1980's:




Walkmans came on the scene - portable music?  "Like... totally no way."  People defined themselves by the artists they listened to.  Just like now, there were many genres of music happening (country, etc.), my recollection are New Wave, and Hair Bands. This tour is not about metal bands, but if a hair ball bastards it's way into the video clips,  /shrug, it's ok, they weren't all for shit.  

You are going to see a good deal of Michael, with reason.  If you are lucky at the end of this... yes... I can and if properly motivated, will... moonwalk for you.




Totally True:                                                                             
FACT:  The 40th president of the USA, Ronald Reagan, was almost assassinated by John W. Hinckley Jr. They found him on the crime scene and arrested him directly.March 1981.

Wicked Wear:                                                                               

Slap bracelets became hip in the late 80's.  I googled how they are made and the definition went into a long-winded-nerd-lullaby that after two pages of dying brain cells, said they are made of a warped piece of metal that goes squirrelly when you smack it.

I picked this photo because it's the most baddass yo!



I did read that this item has become popular in races instead of a baton.  I am immediately amused by thought the of a baton fumble being replaced with a well placed pap! as the runner cruises by. 

Radical Recall:                                                                             

1983: Cindi Lauper:  Girls Just Wanna Have Fun






1980: Blondie: Tide is High

Ligit Lingo:                                                                                    

These were all new in the 80's, some still hanging around. and no, lol... forever fuck no,  I didn't write the "usage" portion, it's so vintage lame I'd be remiss to write my own and attempt to top it.  It smacks of parents of the time trying to define their kids speech and use it in a sentence. 

Fresh
Part of Speech: Adjective
Meaning: Stylish or cool
Usage: Did you see the fresh threads Steff was sporting at the party?

I'm so sure
Part of Speech: Interjection
Meaning: Unbelievable
Usage: You're saying you drove a DeLorean back in time and you helped your parents hook up at their prom? I'm so sure. 

_____
* = people will later hate you for this, and misunderstand it's ingrained, and exceedingly-lasting properties.  /blush.  Then shakes a fist in defiance!